you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize