Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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