i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
