so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize
