Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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