I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize