I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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