kristin has been a bad kristin
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
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