can we get nightvision for the apartment?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
We don't watch enough power rangers
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
