am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
