so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
