Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
