I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
