You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
