Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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