We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize