I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
