I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
