Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
