i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I came so hard my ears popped.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize