that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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