Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
