i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I won't apologize to a one balled man
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
