That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
