you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
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