I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Hippo gnu deer
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
