You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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