Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
