Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
