Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Randomize
