i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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