She's JV to your varsity
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
