You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Randomize
