Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I AM VODKA MAN
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
