Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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