But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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