Don't you send me to vm
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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