Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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