I CAN MOONWALK!
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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