I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
