Heybabeimwearingurpanties
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize
