what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize