We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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