make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
porn star boner night. come get it.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
