Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
