Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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