weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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