I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
