chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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