I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize