ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
