Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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