Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
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