Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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